Kig-Yar
Jackholes, colloquially known as Jackals, F***ing ugly Jackasses, dinner, lunch, breakfast (in Sgt. Johnson's case) and sometimes Y are exactly what their name says; Jack All. Their mortal enemy is KFC. Yep thats right, the chicken leg your eating thats Jackal. They are a skinny race of weird yellow space-chickens. A little known fact is that the Jackholes home-world is a bunch of party-goers. Hence the fact that they all wear mohawks. The Covenant found out because a bunch of Elites needed some down time and wanted to hit up a party planet. After accidentally driving High Charity through half the planet, the remaining Jackals were drafted into the military. Originally intended as rations when described as "turkey-like semi-sentient objects", their purpose was changed to meat shields when the Prophet of Truth was notified that they had tried that and it hadn't gone over well. The prophet then shot the fuckhole who tried to inform them that would not work either, later he was quoted as saying on the matter "Yes. Perfect. Everything is going according to plan." Their "Rave Discs" found a secondary use as a shield (which deflects bullets. Jackals were originally put into combat zones to use up chuck's ammunition), and their leather outfit was used as their combat suit. Jackholes are the first reported Turkey Dancers, and until we find half of a planet that smells like poultry, we will never know. Also, Jackholes are snipers because of their large eyes, which is due to being in dark places full of mad rave discs. They have no intelligible language, because honestly, theirs only two terms party-goers need. "Pass me that beer," and "Dude, get me some nachos." Super Jackal]] Jackal Ranks * Jackal Zealot - Over-salted, overcooked turkey with culture. * Jackal Ranger - Salty, cooked, tasteful turkey with hot sauce. * Skirmisher - Hormone treated turkey with steroids. Tastes like Chuck Norris. * Jackal Sniper - Salty, cooked, tasteful turkey. Good turkey. * Jackal Major - Salty, cooked, tasteless turkey. * Jackal Minor - Unsalted, undercooked, tasteless chicken. The worst of their kind. Reproduction Jackals have no sex organs, so they vomit sperm into the female Jackal's mouth, then she pretends to act glad. Then 2 minutes later, a miracle happens! Baby is born! Known Jackals There were never any famous jackals since nobody wanted to pay attention to an under-fed turkey with jaundice. The most effective weapons against them are rocks, scissors, a Turkey baster, a face full of buckshot, or Thanksgiving Day. Here is the hit list with names of Jackals: * Charlie Dickson * Barrack Obama * Elmo * Superman * Frodo * Soulja Boy * Anoobis(lord of the n00bs) * Yayap, honorary Jackal * Optimis prime * Britney Spears * Sarah Palin * Devon Milford * Charlie Brown * urabu5 * the orange Yoshi, but not the other ones * Ashely from RE4 * Bill Clinton * John Mccain * O.J. Simpson * Everybody who is seen on the Disney Channel * Possibly your Gramma * Rick Ashley * Arnold Swarsenegger * Machael Obama * Cpt. Kathryn Janeway * Barry Manilow *king jackass *Harry Potter *Turkey *Mr. Jackhole *Dr. Turkey *Numb nuts *Everybody who appears in the movie Twilight *MLG *Justin Beiber *Bob Hope *Jo Momma *Axl Rose *TrollJackal - Problem? *Every Fucking Person in Existence Gallery Image:Turkey Hunting.jpg|Proper way to hunt and dispose of turkeys. Note how he is in extreme pain, begging to be eaten for Thanksgiving. Image:Clip_image004.jpg|Turkeys have also been known to pull off Matrix moves Image:Jackal Plasma.jpg|If provoked, turkeys may release energy attacks, which are also mastered by Spartans